If you have fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue, this can be the most frustrating time of the year, instead of the most wonderful, like it should be.
I know. I have been there and I have the scars on my heart to prove it. Because of my absence I have damaged relationships beyond repair. Not being there also counts, but not for anything good, unfortunately.
How confusing are the symptoms of fibromyalgia to the one who suffers?
How more confusing must it be for someone who only sees you a few times a year?
This is a difficult article for me to write as I explore the repercussions of the period of time in my life I had to cancel my attendance to events, and usually at the last minute. I actually just got to the point where I would not make any commitments rather than be a flake. It was very isolating, which only added to my loneliness and depression.
One of my biggest regrets is that I missed out on getting to know my nieces and nephews when they were small. When each one of them were born I really wanted a close relationship with them. Now I am just a familiar stranger to them, and it really breaks my heart.
What has this disease cost you in terms of relationships? I was fortunate, my marriage survived, but a lot of peoples’ don’t fare as well. Also, my relationship with my child is intact mainly because I had him after I recovered. I know a lot of parents who are unable to be the kind of parents they want to be.
If you have to miss the celebration this season, I understand. At the end of the day, you are dealing with an illness that is often invisible. You have to take care of yourself first. I feel for you, and I know that this too shall pass.
But please realize that relationships require attendance. You have to be there to connect. And isn’t connection what everyone is seeking? To feel the warmth of love and friendship with the people we care about the most. You have to be there to make the memories.
Now that I have recovered I have made new relationships and have deepened old ones. I can’t turn back time, and like I state before, some relationships have been damaged beyond repair. However, I am so grateful that I can now be there, I get to connect, and I get to make memories with the people I care about most.
What is your greatest wish? How are you going to make it happen? Do you have an example of anyone else achieving this dream?
This has been difficult to write about, so I want to add a bright spot. In the New Year we will be unveiling some free support resources for you to show you a path out of this darkness. Be on the lookout for the announcement of The Fibromyalgia – Chronic Fatigue – ME World Telesummit that will be broadcast January 26th-28th, 2016.
We are very excited about this! I will be interviewing experts all over the world that are helping people recover naturally from fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue and their coexisting conditions. Real help, real hope, great information.
From the bottom of my heart, this holiday season, I wish for you the feelings of joy, health, understanding and peace.
Leah
The Fibro Lady
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